Sunday, July 22, 2007

no different

I always said (and thought) that I wouldn't treat Madeleine any different than Max. Really. I want her to have similar experiences, I didn't want to give her special treatment. I kidded myself really. How could I think that she wouldn't have anything different, any different experience than Max? Than any child?

Already I regard Madeleine differently. I think I always will. On the surface I carry her. I pay special attention to her needs. I'm extra cautious because I fear she is in pain or uncomfortable.

In the future I will help her understand her new body. I will carry her when she isn't wearing her leg. I will massage her residual limb with fear that she has phantom limb pain, pins and needles or numbness. I will explain her difference to her and those around her.

What part will Max play? Is he already playing it now?

I love my boy. He is the most beautiful boy I have ever known. His smile lights my world and melts my heart. He is a wonderful soul. He is a twin.


jenna said...

Max is a great big brother and he will go through life stronger and so kind because all of the experiences he has gone through with Madeline, he is a lucky boy to be able to play such a special, supportive role, not many chidlren get to learn compassion right from the start. You and Michael are doing great Niki, I just admire your family for all your courage and smiles!

christie said...

you are a great mom and both of your kids are very lucky to have you as a mom. Max and Madeleine ARE SO GREAT and I loved spending time with them last week...

Anonymous said...

aww! What a beautiful post! And I LOVE LOVE your new header!!! Geez you have the cutest kiddoes ever!!! I wish I could kiss them!!! :)