I always said (and thought) that I wouldn't treat Madeleine any different than Max. Really. I want her to have similar experiences, I didn't want to give her special treatment. I kidded myself really. How could I think that she wouldn't have anything different, any different experience than Max? Than any child?
Already I regard Madeleine differently. I think I always will. On the surface I carry her. I pay special attention to her needs. I'm extra cautious because I fear she is in pain or uncomfortable.
In the future I will help her understand her new body. I will carry her when she isn't wearing her leg. I will massage her residual limb with fear that she has phantom limb pain, pins and needles or numbness. I will explain her difference to her and those around her.
What part will Max play? Is he already playing it now?
I love my boy. He is the most beautiful boy I have ever known. His smile lights my world and melts my heart. He is a wonderful soul. He is a twin.