Leggies Here and Leggies There

I'm not really sure the last time I wrote about this but I often think about how Madeleine will always have to deal with the fact that she has a leggie. She will grow up with it and know that she is different. We have tried to water this down by contacting to others who have leggies so that she feels 'normal'. Right now a good majority of her friends have leggies.

She still reminds me, though, that she is different, sometimes. Tonight she said, "Mom, I wish I had two spread foots". ('Spread foot' is her word for her organic foot and my feet. Her manufactured foot is called a 'leggie foot'. FYI.) She went on to ask me if one day she could get a spread foot for her leggie. I replied with, "maybe one day", because honestly, I don't know. And, I wish this for her too.

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Last week we went to Trader Joe's. Usually there is a man that stands outside and plays the violin. When the kids walk by we starts to play "twinkle twinkle" or some other kid-tune. Last week he wasn't there and standing in his place was a young guy with a leggie. He was probably about 25 and held a sign saying, "Disabled. Can't Work. Need Help." Honestly, when I saw him I scoffed. I thought, "of course this dude can work, whatever".

When we left Traders I showed his leggie to Madeleine and she moved closer to get a better look. I walked up to him and told him that my daughter wanted to show him her leg. He leaned down and gasped at seeing her prosthesis. He started to cry. He told her she was beautiful and he was proud of how well she walked. He asked me how long she had it and told me he couldn't believe how well she got around. He told me he lost his leg four months ago and was relearning how to walk. He said his disability hadn't come in yet and he was a bar tender. He was crying and apologized for it. I told him to keep his head up and that things could be worse. We gave him some money and went home and I cried. I'm proud of Madeleine and my heart breaks for this guy. He sounded so hopeless.

I'm proud of Madeleine. She will have struggles throughout her life but Michael and I have laid the foundation and I believe she will be okay.

Biking

It was a rare sunny day in Seattle when the Meyers Family ventured out to the University of Washington's beautiful campus to ride bikes.

Madeleine's dream

It is so funny that my kids are verbal enough now and aware enough to tell me about their dreams. This morning Madeleine told me she had a dream. I asked her if she remembered it and this is what she said...

There was this lady and she was picking up Maxy's poop out of a river. Maxy was there too and I was afraid he was going to float away.

How awesome is that!?

That baby doll pees all the time!

Madeleine got a new baby doll for Christmas. She also received all the accoutrement like diapers, a changing pad, wipes and the other necessities. Madeleine has become obsessed with her baby. She holds her, nurses her and most of all, changes her diaper. All the time. She will put a fresh diaper on the baby and then exclaims, "Oh my goodness, you peed again!" Sometimes she follows that with a 'good job' or a 'I'm so proud of you' (those are direct quotes from her daddy and me while Potty Learning).

That baby doll pees constantly.

Pumpkin Patch

Leggie- one year later

It has been over a year since Madeleine has had her leggie. I took this video of her at the zoo about a month ago. I find myself looking at it and studying it to see if I can really see a difference in the way she walks compared to her peers.

Dr. Mosca urged us to do the amputation early as she would learn to walk with her leggie from the get go. That she wouldn't have attachment to her biological foot and would come to see her prosthesis as an extension of her own body.

Damn, I believe he was right.

Madeleine Conquers the Slide

How awesome is my daughter?

Poop

Let the record show that Madeleine pooped on the potty tonight before bath. We were all so proud! I wanted to take a picture to show you but Michael said it wasn't necessary. All I can say is that it was big, a result of blueberries and smelly.

Way to go Madeleine!

madeleinisms

Funny things Madeleine has said in the past week.

1. No, Tegan is best friend (when I suggested another friend to be the best).

2. I want to see Logan too (when Max suggested playing with Tegan).

3. Andrew's sad. (When discussing a child who fell at school. She said this about a hundred times over the weekend).

4. Doggies funny. Go Ruff Ruff Ruff. They're laughing.

5. It no works. (When pointing to her leggie) There is no foot there.

6. I no like tuna fish.

7. I love you, Daddy.

My Incredible Shrinking Daughter

Apparently Madeleine is shrinking. Maxy is probably shrinking too but we don't notice because he doesn't need umpteen million leg adjustments. I have noticed that Max is getting taller because we don't need to roll up his pants anymore!

Madeleine was my chub. She was born with plenty of 'brown fat' and even though she was only 5 lbs 5 oz when she was born she looked absolutely chubby.

When she was no longer an infant and turned into a real baby (around 4 months) we got comments about how chubby she was. My own mother even asked me if the doctor was worried about her (!) Truth was that Madeleine (and Max) have always been very average in their weights. They have been in the 40th - 50th percentile consistently. And they were 6 weeks premature which means that we wanted them to grow, to eat, to chub up.

For the record, I loved the chub. And, when I find a chubby part (her bum, her arms, thighs, cheeks) I rejoice in it. I eat it, bite it, smooch it, squeeze it, and comment on it.

When we first took Madeleine to see Dr. Mosca and Greg they all commented on how chubby she was. Dr. M said that we wouldn't do the surgery younger than a year and that it would be hard to cast her etc. Greg consulted with his colleague, Peter, and they talked about how they were going to fit a chubby kid with a prosthesis. The OT got in on it and chatted. Holy. What? I walked out of the appointment feeling bad. Was she F-A-T? Should I worry? And then the nice nurse, Sue, said that they see a lot of sick babies so when they see one so robust and healthy they notice it. Thanks Sue!

Madeleine's first leggie came up very far. It was chubby like her and thick. It came above her knee and seemed to take up her entire leg.

She has grown so much now. My chunker is slim and getting tall. Her leg is constantly adjusted. Greg just added another centimeter. The bottom of the leggie now has a skinny ankle. (pictures coming soon). She has slimmed down so much that she is now in a 5-ply sock. We started with a 1-ply. She is literally growing right out of her leg!

Ice Cream on the Sofa

Before we get to the ice cream on the sofa I want to write about our night with Madeleine last night. The kids went to bed at 8:10 or something and although Madeleine didn't have a super hard time getting to sleep it did take her a while.

She woke up at 11pm. Michael and I were just getting to sleep and we waited for a bit to see if she could get back to sleep on her own. Her cries got louder and more urgent. Michael went in to soothe her but she was very upset. He brought her into our bed and it took her at least 15 minutes to settle down. I mean, she cried, howled, tossed and turned. She talked in an urgent voice. I seriously think she was still sleeping. Michael and I talked to her, we calmed her, we rubbed her back. I was two seconds away from picking her up and walking her outside to wake her up and settle her back down. It was all a little concerning.

I'm not sure if our 'behavioral changes' are going to make a difference.

Okay, enough of the bad-



Auntie Martha, this is for you....

Questions for Dr. Kifle

Dr. Kifle is my sleep guru. Seriously, if this guy doesn't make my life a whole lot better I don't know what I'll do. Poor guy, he has no idea that he is going to meet me tomorrow and that I am going to expect miracles.

Questions:

• Why does she wake up at almost exactly the same times every night?
• Is it habit? If so, how do I break it?
• Is Melatonin right for her and for me? (as I have now become so anxious that she will wake up I have a terrible time getting to sleep too)
• Is she ready to sleep in a twin bed?
• Could her rousing in the middle of the night be what is occasionally waking Max up too?
• Do night terrors start this young? Is it possible?
• What do I do?
• What should I expect for an average two year old?
• How many hours of sleep do kids' need at this age?
• What about naps? How long? Is there a 'perfect schedule'?
• Could food/juice affect night waking or difficulty falling asleep? (besides caffeine)
• What do I do?