Mosaic: A Playdate

The twins and I just discovered this fantastic new coffee house in Seattle called Mosaic. If you live in or around Seattle and you haven't been to Mosaic Coffee House you better high tail your butt there, pronto! Not only is it conveniently located in the U-District (off of 45th, kind of behind Dicks) but it is a big, friendly space with free Wi-Fi, nice music and a kid play room (cutely called "demi tasse"). Yes, you heard me, a kid play room, that although it is lacking a bit in toys, it is a spacious room with tables and chairs on one side and mats and toys (including a big play house and kitchen) on the other.

Okay, so this isn't your ordinary coffee house, did I mention it is non-profit? And run by donations?

As a local, nonprofit coffee house, Mosaic exists to allow neighbors an
opportunity to come together while encouraging the building of healthy community through conversation, exciting events, and excellent coffee drinks. At
Mosaic, we believe that each guest who walks through our door is worth more than a labeled price, so we serve our food and beverages with no fixed price.
What does this mean? You decide what it is worth.
The name Mosaic came about by looking at our lives, which often resemble mosaics—filled with broken pieces. We believe a mosaic is only a mosaic when it is formed with many pieces. Here at Mosaic, when our lives are joined with others in our neighborhood and community, we have the opportunity to be part of something truly beautiful.

I know, cool eh? So, this morning I bought a latte, a small hot chocolate to split between the babes (ps, the only way they will drink milk :/) and a croissant. How much is that worth? I gave them $7. I love love love the idea of them donating extra profit to charities. I love the idea that they are all about community. For this reason, you have to go because if you don't they won't stay in business and this fantastic idea will fail.

Better idea, let's meet for a playdate! My kids loved running around like maniacs, noses running, hair stuck to their heads in a bed head kind of way! You get the idea. We scared off two other moms with a toddler each that were there when we arrived. Max was stealing snack traps and Madeleine was putting her germ laden mouth around someone elses sippy cup! Egad! Heathens!

Why is it that my kids want any sippy cup that is not their own? They can have the same exact cup with something better in it and they will still want the other kids'.

I know those other moms would have stayed longer if we hadn't arrived. Was it the runny noses? Was it my conversation?* Hhhhmmmmmm, I'll just have to go back to Mosaic when the noses aren't runny and see.

*The Mom Rule: when you are a mom and you see another mom of a child that is about the same age as your child you must converse. You must find out what you have in common, what your kids are doing that is similar, if you are a stay at home or working mother etc. Sometimes the conversation is strained and lame, sometimes it is fascinating and you are instant friends.

Phantom Limb Pain

You have heard of this. Everyone knows about phantom limb pain. I knew about it even before my daughter had her foot amputated. The idea conjures up images of war veterans without legs, lying and crying in their hospital beds. I'm reminiscing about old M*A*S*H episodes now.

I thought about phantom limb pain and how they may affect Madeleine. I was assured that this would not happen to someone so young. Dr. Mosca told us that if we amputate young (under 2) she would not have phantom pain. He said there was no known research that showed babies to have pain after an amputation. This was one reason to do the surgery while she was young. Another reason is that she would not have attachment to that body part. Granted.

I'm not sure that I believe this now. I think that maybe children do experience phantom limb pain but cannot tell us about it therefore we think it doesn't exist. However, even without words Madeleine is a great communicator. For instance, if she wants to read more books (as a way of delaying bed time) she points to the books, the rocking chair and whines a bit. So, why then, when she cries in the middle of the night and points to the bottom of her leggie should I not assume that she is experiencing pain? She will often hold or grab the bottom of her leg at night. Once, I came in to answer her drowsy cries and she was biting at the end of her leg.

In the article highlighted above the author writes:
Phantom limb pain – pain appearing to come from where an amputated limb used to be – is often excruciating and almost impossible to treat.

He then goes on to say:
After amputation of a limb, an amputee continues to have an awareness of it and to experience sensations from it. These phantom limb sensations are also present in children born without a limb, suggesting that perception of our limbs is 'hard-wired' into our brain and that sensations from the limbs become mapped onto these brain networks as we develop.
If phantom limb sensations are normal then so too, alas, is phantom limb pain. This occurs in a majority of those who lose their limbs. (1) In fact, limbs do not need to be lost; it also occurs in conditions in which the brain is disconnected from the body, such as peripheral nerve injuries and after spinal cord injury, when an area becomes insentient (and usually paralysed).

The pain is described in various ways: burning, aching, 'as if the hand is being crushed in a vice,' etc. Such words, however, cannot fully encompass the experience of living with such a pain.

If this article is true than I can assume that Madeleine is experiencing some sensation. To ease this I rub her leg, I talk to her about it and reassure her that all is okay and she is not in a painful situation. Of course I worry about this. It makes me sad. But still, I do not regret our decision to ampute. If we had lengthened I'm assuming the pain would be greater.

Madeleine wakes up more than Max, usually. This is why I could never let her "cry it out".

FH: Our Forever Label

Just as parents and kids with Autism will always be in the world of autism we will always be in the world of Fibular Hemimelia. My daughter will always be associated with it- I will always be a mother of a child with Fibular Hemimelia.

I am called back to the day when I first heard this label. It was February 20th, 2006. At the time I don't know if I could have identified a fibula on a map if I tried (thinking of those high school students now who don't know where Georgia is). Dr. Saliman said, "Let me tell you what it is called and then I will discuss the treatment..." I grabbed a pen and paper to write it down. Geez, now it is part of my daily vocabulary!

My daughter has one fibula. She now only has one foot. 5 toes. "Madeleine, how many fingers am I holding up?" "Count your toes!" Woops, we are missing some.

When Dr. S told us that many children with FH have missing toes I was horrified. Such a silly thing to be horrified about! I remember my friends, Megan and Serena, who worked in a hospital telling me about a man who had only four toes. I thought about how my child would be the one that the nurses talked about. How kids would notice she only had four toes (or three) and make fun of her in her little sandals.

When Madeleine was born with five toes I saw it as a victory. Ha, you doctors! I made a child with all ten toes! Her foot is perfect! FH, my ass.

We amputated. We took off her perfect five toed foot. I never, well almost never, regret this. I see my daughter walking around, I see her climbing stairs, I see her squatting and standing back up, bending over, lifting her leg and I never regret taking off her foot.

When I am rocking her to sleep in the middle of the night, which happens more than I'd like to admit, I am reminded of that perfect little foot. Sometimes I am surprised that that her foot is gone. Crazy. In the middle of the night in my sleepy haze I will see that short leg sans foot and for a quick moment I will be surprised. I will wonder where that foot is. I will be horrified. And then I remember and still there is little regret.

I miss it though.

Calling our blogging friends...

Since I have just added a link list to our blog I want to invite you to be one of our links. If you are our friend and you have a blog (you know who you are--- wink wink) let me know if you want me to link you to us. I don't want to do it without your permission.

Thanks friends!

Bah Humbug?

As Max and Madeleine were busy being elves Daddy turned into Scrooge!


http://www.scroogeyourself.com/?id=1180390641

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1180705079

Walking in a Winter Wonderland

In case you haven't heard... Seattle got snow last weekend. Here are some shots from the babies first snow fall.

Maxy clearly enjoyed the snow more than Madeleine.
Trying to get them to pose and look at the camera- not an easy feat when dealing with twin toddlers.
I love Max's face in this one!

Although it was pretty and fun for a bit it melted about as fast as it came. Mom is certainly happy to not have snow in her life. If I liked snow I would have stayed in Michigan!!!!

Tis the Season

The season has sprung in the Northwest. Not only did we get TONS of snow over the weekend we have begun to decorate the house for Christmas. Much to Michael's chagrin we have left the snow village and our big Christmas tree in storage. As faux Christmas trees contain lead (as do the lights) we have decided to fore go the big tree this year. We knew that we would not be able to effectively keep the babes from touching (read destroying) the tree and all its decorations this year.

We do, however, have a little bitty tree sitting up on our side board that the M's are welcome to look at and not touch.

Christmas cards have been ordered. After many a photo shoot I think we have the pictures we will use this year. It took a bit to get both kids looking at the camera. It sure was easier last year when they didn't move! No previews- you will have to wait for your card in the mail!

Christmas shopping has also begun. Don't tell Max but we got him some kid cleaning supplies! My boy loves to sweep! Really a chip off the ol' block, if you know Michael you also know about his cleanliness habit. I'm still working on Madeleine's main gift. She is a little trickier to shop quickly for.

Michael is working on this as a main present from Santa:


We have already picked up some fake food along the way and now that the kids are into 'pretend play' more I think this will be a hit.