It has been too long. I have felt the absence of my journaling and am hoping that I can regain some blog control and contribution.
Can I just say that the fact that it has been nearly four years since my children were born is beyond me. I feel like myself again. Only this time I'm sporting a floppy belly, stretch marks and saggy boobs. I don't mind though. 5 years ago I was getting ready to do IVF in hopes of starting a family. sigh.
When I say that I feel like myself this is real. I'm the weight that I was when I got pregnant. I'm working, although in a different capacity, with what I went to graduate school for. I feel normal... only mom. And, I'm incredibly thankful for the success of my business, with my loving and loyal husband, and my smart and talented kids. It sounds hard to believe but I still can't believe that this is my life, that I have been blessed beyond comprehension.
Because of Michael and my struggles in getting pregnant the fact that we have two children remains an impossibility for me to comprehend. I know that I have been raising the products of my loins for 4 years but I still can hardly believe that they are mine, that they grew inside of me and then came out full people. I love it.
My dear dear dear friend is pregnant with her second. She, like I did, had a difficult first time around in pregnancy with plenty of unknowns and plenty of tears. The second baby is bringing her clarity in knowing what to expect and not caring if there are legs present or not. I was so extremely fortunate to join her for an early ultrasound. It blows my mind that I can be looking at my friend and essentially she looks the same as she always has and then we get a glimpse inside of her and there is a total and complete baby growing. A tiny baby with all four limbs, a heart and a brain and he/she is only 3.5 centimeters! A miracle.
I have another dear friend that just had her second baby and her first little boy. She had the birth experience she wanted and an incredibly pregnancy. I'm amazed that she made a person in her body. That he came out and she now has an individual to get to know, to shape, to love added to her family.
As I type this my babies are lying of the sofa watching Kipper with their daddy. They are clad in long underwear-type pajamas and they are discussing what they are seeing. They have full use of language and a command of their small bodies. They are my miracles.
Thanks for reading my random thoughts.